Like the Eagle

Not too long ago I began to think about life and death.  It struck me to know that I have out lived my mother and will soon reach the age of 34, an age my mother never reached.  I was thinking about the process of grief and the reality of loss.  Sometimes you want to shout before the world, expecting the world to owe you because you didn't get in life what you think you should have... but really, the only way to not allow for grief and pain to become toxic is really to simply grief the losses that you know you'll never re-gain even if that is what you desire.  I'll never have a mother and maybe I'll never have the things I really truly desire in life.  I'm not talking about relationship but who knows.  I'm 34, I'm single, there is no potential man knocking on my door, and I have no children.  I am an older single woman and whether I'm single or married, with children or no children, God has promised an abundant life and so my happiness is not in worldly possessions.  As Jesus said in John 10:10, "I came that they might have life and life abundantly".  There are just some losses I have to allow to remain as a loss, grief the loss and continue to live life to the full.  This is a picture of my mother, Barbara Husband Melnychuk.  You can't really tell much in this photo so I'll describe her a little.  She was a "ginger"... a firey red headed woman who was strong and yet welcoming.  My Nana once told me a story of a time she came over to visit.  This was some time shortly after my brother and I were born.  The three of us were playing on the living room floor and Nana began to criticize her.  Just so you know, this story I heard directly from my Nana, so I know that when my Nana said she was criticizing her, it happened.  She came walking through the door to find the laundry and the dishes piling up.  My mother had help, she had a house cleaner that came on a regular basis to come and clean and provide a little extra help.  I think my mother dealing with and giving birth to 2 sets of twins is deserving of an award, especially when struggling with terminal cancer and with her body failing her.  I guess this interaction between my Nana and mother really touched my Nana's heart and years later to know this story has really ministered to my heart because it really places weight behind my own grief and the honest pain of it.  My mother responded, "the laundry will always be there needing to get done but I'm not always going to be here for my children... the laundry can wait" I guess my Nana cleaned up the house, did the laundry and washed the dishes while my mother invested all our hours awake just loving and being loved and treasuring each moment as if it were the last.  

Brothers and sisters,  we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.  

~ 1 Thessalonians 4:13

My hope is in Christ and I intend to live each day to its fullest and live each day as if it were my last.  I am learning to face hardship head on knowing that life really involves this cyclical pattern of joy sorrow happiness and grief.

I love the eagle.  There is something majestic about the eagle.  In Native beliefs the eagle is a prophetic picture, they carry a message, the Creator will speak through the Eagle.  And if you understand the nature of the Eagle you will see just how prophetic and biblical picture they really are.  From around the world in ancient times the Eagle has been used a symbol of strength and courage.  It's no wonder since it is a well known fact that when a storm is brewing the Eagle will find the highest point and will wait until the full maturing of the storm and instead of waiting out the storm the Eagle will lift off and head directly into the storm and while using the strength of the wind the Eagle will lock its wings and allow the wind to push the Eagle above the storm and virtually ride out the storm and what could have ended with deadly consequences becomes an adventure the Eagle loves.  It is natural for us to want to get away from the storm and shelter ourselves and run away from pain or painful circumstances but we never allow for present circumstances in life to teach us anything.  What are the 4 winds telling us?  What can the storm tell us?  What is our Creator trying to tell us through His Creation?  In world history it is a known fact that the Navajo Code Talkers were credited for using their own language to confuse the enemy in WWII, one of the words they used was ATSAH which means Eagle.

But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles;

they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

~ Isaiah 40:31

My heart has been heavy for some family members today with a couple of significant losses.  One in particular has been the unexpected passing of my Uncle Smokey a few days ago.  Through this family I was inspired to learn about my Native ancestry, the culture and the People as well as Native Spirituality.  Native's are a Prophetic People and this is what intrigues me the most.  The culture and spirituality so similar to Jewish spirituality and biblical symbolism, acceptance of a Great Holy Spirit.  A prophesy once told, years ago, has been called The Black Book Prophesy.  Natives were prepared by the Spirit, having been told that a People would come with a black book and in that black book would contain the truth.  In that black book, we know today and from history is the bible.  Today, Native American's are quick to reject the white man's religion of Jesus but are quick to embrace the God of Israel, Yeshua h' Massiac.  Jesus is the white man's God but Yeshua is the God of the black book, the God of Israel.  So if you visit Native American churches don't be surprised of you hear Natives calling Jesus Yeshua.  For the most part, my family who are among the First Nations are predominantly Roman Catholic.  I believe my family has had a more positive experience with the Roman Catholic church in comparison to other First Nations who have endured the residential schools.  If my Grandmother didn't attend the residential school I am assuming that my Uncle Smokey didn't either and I can assume with such a high respect given to the Catholic church among many extended family members I assume history with my family and the Roman Catholic church has been a more positive experience.  Uncle Smokey was a gentle man who had wisdom.  Over the last week I have been hearing over and over again about how incredible a man he was and he leaves behind a legacy.  I'm not surprised... my Grandmother has left behind a legacy in our family and so this is no surprise to me that Uncle Smokey has left a legacy with his children and Grandchildren.  In times of unexpected losses there is a certain amount of grief.  I wasn't close to Uncle Smokey but I know my cousins were close to their Papa.  And when there is a legacy left behind I am stirred up inside about the kind of legacy I will leave behind and this stirs in my heart to want to live just a little bit more fuller and take more risks, love deeper and love truer, to take life as it comes with challenges and all, and like to eagle, being confident in Christ and rise above and in times like this knowing that one day I will be reunited with loved ones that have gone before me and today knowing that those who have gone on before me, I believe, remain as my cloud of witnesses...  

Therefore since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles.  And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

~ Hebrews 12:1,2